#CountVlad – already reaping some benefits


i am guest author on h.r.r. gorman’s page – count vlad dracula tepes

i have found a couple willing blood donors here online.  i guess i appreciate that since i definitely need more blood if im ever to complete my dark ritual to cover the sun.

today however i wanted to talk to you about central heating.  i dont really like outside, so i didnt realize it wasnt warm outside hrr gorman’s house.  in lieu of rent i had to walk the dog the other day and in between bouts where the incorrigible little mutt wouldnt shut up or stop biting me i noticed that it was cold.

first off, some of you may assume the undead are immune to cold.  this is quite true up to a point since rotting flesh does not rot as fast in the cold.  i usually spend much less magic in the winter to keep my body active.

but with this central heating garbage ive had to keep churning through blood and magic to stay un-alive.  now i know how to close the vents and i stuffed rags under my bedroom door so not so much heat comes in.  i can open the window but then fresh air comes in and i dont like that so instead i just pout about how warm it is in here.

so yeah why did you humans have to invent so much terrible stuff while I was in my ensorceled crypt?  this is terrible.  christmas songs all december everywhere and central heating what will you think of next.


Count Vlad Dracula Tepes was invited against H.R.R. Gorman’s best interest, but he swears that anti-vampire racism will one day come back to literally bite us all.  Not one to rock the boat, H.R.R. Gorman set Dracula up with this limited WordPress blogging account.   

Dracula doesn’t like typing, looking at computer screens, or garlic.  He enjoys dark sunsets, nights out on the town, and type O+. 

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