The Secret Life of your Hammer

black claw hammer on brown wooden plank

Usually the hammer lived happily in a drawer next to the tape measure and a molten pack of gum, but sometimes the humans would attack. Someone would be abducted, sometimes for days, and abused mercilessly at their hands.

Today storm clouds whirled above, and the humans had innocent sheets of plywood to serve as storm windows. They withdrew a nail from a sack on their belts.

“Ow! Ow!” screeched the hammer.

But the human didn’t care. He beat the hammer senseless, imprisoned the poor nails in the plywood and siding, then left them precariously outside as the hurricane blew…

Divider

This was written for the November 14th Carrot Ranch prompt, storm windows. I think this one has more the feel of a “yarn,” but I enjoyed it and hope you did to!

Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

 

Hurricane Prep

I’ve had several well-wishes from so many of you.  First, I am so humble that so many people are thinking about me in the hurricane.  Luckily for me, the storm’s path has turned south, and I’m probably only going to experience minor flooding, maybe brief power outages.  Up until this morning, though, the predictions had looked pretty grim.

Part of those predictions meant that we cooked literally everything that needed baking in the house.  We got rid of those crazy ‘perishables.’

cookin

If the storm doesn’t get me, y’all, my arteries are going to clog for sure.  Now that we have no choice, we gotta eat all of that.

We have a spinach quiche (eggs, spinach, pie crust, and milk needed to be used), 2 pizzas (one was already in the fridge at the time of the picture), vidalia dip (to get rid of a chopped onion, cheese, mayo), and corn casserole (sour cream, eggs, butter, corn, cheese).  With all the butter that went into this, Paula Deen, bless her little racist heart, would be proud.  Or diabetic, take your pick.

My fridge is also crazy full of bowls of water.  We didn’t get out in time to actually buy bottled water like they suggest, so I’m guessing Gladware full of tap water is probably fine.  I don’t think we live in the way of the Duke coal ash spill.

Anyway, thanks for the well-wishes. I’ll keep in touch, but for now I have a few blog posts pre-scheduled for the coming days.

Best,

H.R.R. Gorman

Breath of Florence

Florence

Clouds churn the water

furiously closing escape

for the unprepared.

***

This week, Colleen chose ‘Plan’ and ‘Finish’ for her words.  Since most of my week has been literally planning for the biggest hurricane my state has ever seen (NC represent, woot woot!), I couldn’t bring myself to do anything other than a seasonal, weather focused haiku. 

If you believe in prayer or the power of good vibes, I’d much appreciate them.  Pretty nervous since we couldn’t board up our windows… If I’m not online for a while, you’ll know why.